Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Limbo

I'm in limbo right now. It's terrible, and confusing. I'm not a college student (finished last week. WOO!), but I don't graduate until this Saturday. I have one job (in publishing. What?) secured, while another depends on a mountain of red tape and paperwork. My wardrobe is half college, half high school, no business. That last one is just a matter of my obstinate avoidance of slacks and button up tops, but still. Limbo. Population: me.

It's one of those turning points in life, except now nothing is certain. For my whole life, I've had a plan: learn to walk, figure out how to ride my bike, wait for the next Harry Potter book, get to high school, write, get to college, write.

For the first time in my life, I don't have a plan for the next four or so years of my life. It's terrifying, but exhilarating. I know that it's dangerous to write about "real life" beginning, because when does real life begin? I've been living real life in its various stages for 21 years, so this certainly isn't a plunge into real life. It's no more solid than anything else I've lived. But maybe, maybe it's a matter of throwing away the map. Having no GPS, so to speak. Just staring down the road with a vague idea of where I want to go, and a hope that I can drive myself there with my own sense of direction.

Wow. That metaphor fails. Who drives without a map? Ok. Let's say my sense of direction is the North Star. How about that? That makes it a little better.

But I digress.

I suppose I can't complain about monotony. In all likelihood, by September I'll be on another continent, speaking another language, typing madly away at query letters and blogs, working to better the world through promoting literacy in its various forms.

Which is my major epiphany of the past few months, by the way.

I want to spend my life bettering the world through promoting literacy! I've sort of known this for a while, but all of my career aspirations have honed in on it in a way my brain never did: teaching English, working in publishing, writing novels.

Brain: "Duh, Kira. Duh."

Me: "Don't be mean. College ruined my common sense."

There is so much I could write about right now, so I apologize for this vague, rant-filled post. Upcoming blog posts include (but are not limited to):

1) My epic road trip to House on the Rock (and how Neil Gaiman completely inspired it).

2) Printer's Row, Sears Tower (No, NOT Willis Tower), and Divergent.

3) Editing my baby (and how I'm still in love with it after all this time).

4) Stephen Colbert's epic commencement speech of epicness. I just picked up my cap and gown today, so I feel a little awestruck at the moment.

5) The benefits and downfalls of fanfiction.

6) Titles of books (why they change, and why they matter).

7) Why no one should live with their parents after graduating college unless they're willing to suffer the consequences (whoops. Not a blog post topic. Just a frustrating rant you should pray I don't put here).

So there's some goodness coming up. I hope. I think.

In the meantime, here's some jam music to keep you busy. If you've read Morgantown (or as it's called now, ANIMUS), this is what someone recently told me is Derrick's themesong. So clearly that makes me happy: